Summer Fun

I am starting to think that summer has finally decided to come and stay in ND! The temps last week were gorgeous and the boy and I got some really good time outside. I think this week we are going to drag out the pool and fill it up.

Not so good part about summer is that the mosquitoes, flies, and bees are out. I hate using bug spray on myself and the boy cause it is stinky and sticky, but the alternative is swollen, itchy bumps from the mosquitoes so I guess we will be using it. Today I had a run in with a couple of bees. I was in a sweater set and was outside weeding my flower beds, I had gotten warm and took off the sweater and laid it on the lawn chair. After weeding I decided to put the sweater back on and stuck my arm in the sleeve, and BAM! Two bees were in there and decided it was theirs and so stung the underside of my right arm! OUCH! I had forgotten how much it stinks to have a bee sting!

Other big news this week is that I am kinda sorta working on potty training with the boy. He will most times pee in the potty upon request but no poop yet, and has only once told me when he has to go. But still big progress for us. Hoping by midsummer to have him trained so that we are completely out of diapers for the hot months of july, august, and september!

Big kids have three days of school this week and then they are out for summer vacation. They are very excited, me not so much! They both have summer jobs that will require some of their time, but I have a feeling there will be plenty of "I'm Bored" I don't do well with that! I have our late summer vacation planned for July. We are going down to South Dakota for about 5 days and will be visiting the Laura Ingalls Wilder museum, Pa's homestead, and all that stuff in De Smet. And then will be visiting Mt. Rushmore and Crazy Horse Memorial too. I am excited, I don't think Big Brother is very excited though, he told me that it sounds like a vacation for old people....Sigh... Every vacation can't be disney you know!

So work wise, the farm is pretty well caught up, I think that in the next few weeks we should be done planting so that is a good thing, but then we will quickly move on to row crop cultivating, and spraying for weeds. Never ending work on a farm you know. Found out that we are being audited by our crop insurance company, just a routine audit, but makes me crazy, my first year home on the farm doing books and I am being audited!!

Well I think I am going to have to find something suitable for dinner, get the boy off the floor where he is whining, and clean up the mess from not cleaning all weekend!

Manic Monday

Well Monday has found me again...So much going on don't know where to start.

Had a very good but busy weekend. Saturday the Big Boy and I went to Grand Forks on the hunt for garage sales. We found some! Hit about 30 of them, most of them in a 4 block radius. Got the little boy his summer, and part of his winter wardrobe! The big boy and sister got some stuff too, all in all a very productive trip. Then spent the late afternoon and early evening working on flower beds. I have a love hate relationship with them. I LOVE flowers, I really try hard to make them work, but I am just not very good at them. I am hoping now that I have a little more time to tend them that they will live longer than a few weeks. We will see.

Sunday brought church and visiting with the great grandparents. I love my hubby's grandparents. They have been so wonderful to me and my children. I get sad thinking of the day there will be no more sunday treats at grandma's. But at 87 years for the both of them, we know those days are precious and limited. I am just thankful that my kids have all gotten to know them and love them. Sunday after lunch was mowing. I mowed for 3 hours and burned my face and neck mighty handily. The sad part is I am not even close to done. I have at least 3 more hours worth of mowing, weed eating, etc. before I am done.

Today I am attempting my mountain of laundry, and cleaning the house, in between taking care of my sick boy. He has been running low grade fevers on and off for about 4 days, and now his nose is permanently on run, and his cough is just getting worse, he is getting a rattle in his chest so we are heading out to the doc this afternoon to be checked. I am a little paranoid about his lungs after having so much trouble when he was so little with RSV. Paranoid maybe, but I would rather be safe than sorry.

Mothers Day

Well another mothers day has come and gone. Mothers Day is always a little bittersweet for me. My mother passed away 3 years ago and there isn't a single day that goes by that I still don't miss her. She was a very strong woman and she told it like it is. Thinking of her always makes me sit and contemplate the relationship I have with my own kids. While growing up I knew my parents loved me but always wondered why they had to be so strict...Now that I am a parent I understand and I have tried to make my kids understand, but they like me will have to just learn from experience. I would not say that my mom and I were ever "friends", but she was always there for me to listen, to advise, and to love me and my children unconditionally. She was so kind and generous to everyone. She came from a very large family, she had 13 brothers and sisters so she new how to share that is for sure. As I get older it is weird for me because as gain a little weight and get a few laugh lines, it strikes me how much I look like her.

My youngest drew never got to meet her. In fact I am pretty postive the only reason we have drew is because she bent the ear of the big guy! From the time my husband and I started dating she would needle him and I repeatedly about having a baby. I had two children from before I met him and so we said we weren't having children. She hated when we would say that. As the years passed we always thought she would give up, but she never did. When she got cancer and got really sick, she still gave us grief. Well about 2 weeks before she passed away, I was sitting with her in her hospital room talking about this and that, and out of the blue she looked at me and said "you know when I die, and I get to heaven, I am going to be an angel, and I am going to make sure you give me a new grandbaby" I just laughed it off........Yeah, 6 months to the day my mother passed, I found out I was pregnant with drew. So he is grandma's miracle baby, and she got to hear me cuss her out all the way to the hospital while I was in labor! I look into his sweet little face and it pains me that he will never be able to sit in her lap and have her love on him like she did the big kids....she wanted him more than all of us combined, I hope she is looking down enjoying every minute of his antics!

Sick and Feeling Guilty

Well the spring sickies have found me. Sore throat, stuffy nose, no energy. I get one every year. I know it will be short lived, but that brings me to the guilty part. Every since I started staying home to work, I have a guilt complex. I know that between doing the farm books, keeping the house clean, and chasing a 2.5 year old I keep plenty busy....But for some reason I feel the need to defend what I have been doing all day to people, my husband, father in law etc. I know that they don't expect me to be running like a chicken with my head cut off 24 hours a day, but at the same time I feel almost guilty if I sit and read, or watch a tv show, or check my facebook page. Why is that? I never used to have guilt about anything for any reason. I always considered it a character plus to not care, but now it has intruded into my life, and I don't think I like it.

So the not caring, and the caring part of my brains wage war...On the plus side, I do get alot done out of guilt, but on the negative side, I feel a little cranky at my family cause they all get to come home after work/school and relax and I am still working! I know I will eventually come to some sort of level where I feel comfortable with sitting once in a while and still getting alot done.

Old Friends

The last couple months I have been looking back at my life and looking at all my accomplishments and mistakes. It makes me think of old friends I have lost touch with. So I decided in this age of information technology there is no reason that I couldn't reconnect. So on to Facebook search I went. It amazed me how quickly I was able to find two cousins and my BFF from high school. The cousins were an easy add...but I really had to think about adding the BFF. She and I were as close as sisters. We did everything together and in fact were able to finish each others sentences. Then grown up life kinda intruded...I let her live in my house, she didn't take care of it...my boyfriend didn't like her...or her boyfriend. I left my boyfriend and messed around all while in her company, you know those type of 18 year old shenanigans. But it was enough to ruin our friendship, we stopped talking and she moved away and I haven't seen her for almost 16 years.

I missed her and I think more to the point I am kinda nostalgic for the girl I was when I knew her. I was so confident and carefree. I was convinced that I was going to take on the world and conquer it. Don't get me wrong I completely love how my life has turned out...but it is not the life I thought I would have. So I sent her a message and added her as a friend. It will be interesting to see if she adds me as well. What do you say after 16 years of not talking when you ended on bad terms. I guess we will just have to play it by ear.